The Office Missing Mug Riot - A Sketch

Int - Office - Kitchen - 09:00 am

2 women - one making coffee the other looking in a cupboard of mugs

Sophie: Oh...

Lisa: You alright Sophe?

Sophie: Yeah, I just can't find my mug.

Lisa: Oh I'm sorry I'm sure it'll turn up.

Sophie: Yeah...

09:15 - Sophie's desk

Sophie is working away and Marc is walking by and stops.

Marc (surprised): No tea today Sophe?

Sophie: No not today Marc I couldn't find my mug.

Marc: Oh no! I'll have a quick look for it while I make my coffee.

09:30 - Lisa's desk - Marc is standing beside her desk with coffee in hand chatting to Lisa as she works

Marc: Oh did you hear about Sophie's mug?

Lisa: Yeah, it's a shame.

Marc: I tried to find it but just could not  see it  anywhere.

Lisa: We could ask around. See if anyone else has seen anything.

Marc: OH! I'll go ask the cleaners!

Lisa: And I could make flyers!

Marc (reaching out for a high-five): Gooooo Team!

Lisa rolls her eyes and gets on with making the flyers at her computer

Marc retracts the high-five and tries to laugh it off and exits awkwardly. 

09:35 - cleaning cupboard 

Marc knocks on the door and peeks round looking into the cupboard. The cleaning staff are sat on buckets smoking and cackling with laughter. They look quit gross and rough.

Marc: Hey guys! sooo you know Sophie on 6th? 

Blank glares from cleaning staff

Marc: Yeah well,  she's lost her mug and I was wanting to ask, check really if you might know what happened to it?

Cleaning staff grunt angrily at him.

Marc: No! I'm not saying you took it I'm just checking if you've seen it or if it has happened to end up in your care and you want to return then you can -

The cleaning staff throws cleaning products at Marc he jumps back and slams the door quickly. We can hear a clatter followed by a cackle. 

09:45 -  Photocopier - Lisa is coping the flyers she made Marc enters

Marc: Right! Well the cleaning staff were no help! Bloody brutes! I think we need to get more serious I was thinking of hiring meeting room B and bringing people in for an investigation.

Lisa: Like good cop bad cop?

Marc: No Lisa don't be ridiculous this is the real world not some US cop drama. Notice you've been no help so far by the way.

Lisa: Actually Marc I'm making missing posters (holding up a poster to Marc) see.

Marc: Right- well I'll keep doing the real work like interrogating the team. While you post missing posters around the office. 

Marc storms off

10:15 - Inside the meeting room. It's dull with a signal light and a desk with a man (Jeff) sat in a chair waiting.

Marc enters

Marc: Hi, Jeff thanks for meeting me.

Jeff: Marc is this going to be long? I've very busy with reports. And why is it so dark?

Marc: I'll ask the questions Jeff! What do you know about the missing mug?

Jeff: What mug?

Marc: Don't play dumb Jeff you went to make coffee early this morning and there was reports of loads of clatter followed by a smash. So I'll ask again (Slamming a picture of Sophie's mug on the table, it's white and says Sophie on it) What do you know about the mug Jeff!?

Jeff: You mean Sophie's mug?

Marc: SO you do know something! I bet you smashed it didn't you!

Jeff: No Marc. I dropped my mug this morning and it smashed. (Getting up) Look I don't have time for this. (Leaving) See you later.

Marc: Yeah well I guess that is possible.

Sophie's desk - she is buying herself a personalised mug with her name on it for very cheap with same day delivery.

10.30 - Wall Beside Sophie's desk Lisa has put a height chart up with mug pictures like  a police line up. 

Lisa (to Sophie): Could you please point to the culprit? (beat - Lisa looks very please) Or should I say cup-rit? eh mam?

Sophie (pointing at her mug): This one.

Lisa: Are you sure mam?

Sophie: Uh - yeah.

Sophie gets back to work. 

Lisa: Interesting, very interesting indeed.

11.00 -  The whole office has been torn apart, tables flipped, paper everywhere, Lisa is crawling about on the floor with missing posters crying "Has anyone seen this mug!" with make-up running down her face. Marc is harassing Jeff shouting and waving his arms about "I know you did it Jeff! Just confess! Do it! Confess". Jeff is ignoring him and continuing work on his computer. Someone has started a fire for some reason. The office in chaos over this mug. Sophie is nowhere to be seen.

Still 11.00 - Office reception Sophie is collecting a package, the label on it clearly shows it's for a custom mug. Sophie carries the package to the lift passing one of the cleaners who is holding a mug. As she passes, the camera  focuses on the cleaners face as they take a drink. The mug has Sophie written on it and looks like the one Sophie was browsing earlier. 

Druids and Wild Shape - DnD Sketch

 Int - A group of people are sat at a table playing dnd. Wizard (W), Knight (K), Druid (D) and the Dungeon Master (DM).

DM: You enter the room, it has a wall of books, a chest and some stairs. What would you like to do, Wizard?

W: I'd like to look for some books on magic and study them for about 10 minutes.

DM: Ok, while you do that Knight, what about you?

K: I'd like to check that chest. Is there any weapons?

DM: You find a great sword, you can add that to your character sheet.

    K starts furiously jotting it down.

DM: Druid what about-

D(Looking at multiple papers, holding up a finger): Wait a sec, just checking what I can wild shape into that can fly.

W: I don't think you can we're only level 2.

DM: Correct! Why do you need to fly you're in a room?

D: To get up to the next floor.

DM: There is stairs.

D: Ah ok so I'll turn into... into.. just a sec... a panther! Yeah then I can run really fast up the stairs.

K: I mean there's no rush, we have to wait on the wizard.

DM: Also it doesn't matter about speed, you're not in combat and the stairs are-

D: I wild shape!

DM: Ok... you are now a panther and run really fast up the stairs without your party... I guess.

    Fade - some time has passed, snacks have been opened and the table has a battle map and mini figures.

DM: An ogre has appeared in front of you, Knight, you are up first.

K(Rolling dice): I slash it with my sword!

DM: Hit! Wizard you're up next!

W: I cast acid splash!

DM(rolls dice): They fail the save! Druid your turn, go!

D: I use my claw attack!

DM: You don't have a claw attack, you're a dwarf.

D: I'm in wild shape.

DM: It has been an hour since then so it would have-

D: Wild shape!

K: What! Again?

DM: The ogre takes a massive swing at you, does a 15 hit?

D(disappointed): Uh-huh.

DM: The ogre hits you so hard that you drop your wild shape.

    Fade more time has passed. The characters look captivated by the DM, except for the druid who is looking through many papers once again.

DM: You have reached the Lady Enchantress  of the realm. What would you like to do?

K: I get down on one knee, bow my head and say "Greetings my lady".

W: I bow my head, staff in hand and say "A pleasure to meet you Lady Enchantress".

D(Looking lost): I want to long rest.

W&K: Now?

D: Yes I want to long rest.

DM: You want to long rest, right at the end of your adventure after fighting ogres and hundreds of dark wizards. You are finally able to greet the Lady Enchantress and receive your final reward. And YOU want to long rest. Why?!

D: I'm out of wild shape uses.

DM: All you have to do is say hi, you do not need to- you want to to- (Getting up angry, waving arms around) nope! Done! No more wild shape (rips up notes) campaigns over! Go wild shape into a panther and run home!

Trying to Watch a Movie with your Girlfriend

 Int - couple (boyfriend BF, girlfriend GF) sat on sofa in living room, in front of  a TV.

BF: Do you want to watch a movie?

GF(Getting up): Nah don't feel like one. (Exits)

    Fade in/out Gf has entered shot again but now  the room is much cosier looking with low lights and there is a variety of snacks laid out. BF has streaming services open on TV.

GF: aww you never said you'd make it all nice in here I wanna watch (Sits down).

    Fade in/out BF and GF scrolling through streaming service

BF: How about this one?

Gf: No...

BF: This one?

GF: Nah.

BF: Oh this looks-

GF: Nope!

    Fade in/out some time later

GF(Pointing at screen): Oh! Oh! That one!

BF: That one?

GF: Yeah!

BF: The one you've seen 100 times?

GF: Yes! Pleeeaaassee?

BF: Ok fine.

    Movie starts and GF immediately falls asleep.

BF: Great, so glad we're watching this again while you sleep.

    BF tries to change movie and GF suddenly wakes up.

GF: Oi! I'm watching that!

BF(sighs): Fine (changes movie back)

GF: Wait pause! I need a wee

    Fade in/out shot of GF asleep on the sofa while movie plays.

Over Explaining a Simple Question - A Shop Sketch

 Int - Day time - Games Shop

    Bored cashier (C)  behind a counter.  A man (M) enters the store with his girlfriend (G) who goes off camera as M approaches the counter.

C: Hi how can I help you today?

M: Hi, so yesterday I saw on your website that you had a new controller and saw it was like mine so I went to google, on my phone, not my computer because I was on the bus. I was actually on my way here to buy a game anyway but it turns out the controller is  a newer version of mine and I saw it was preorder only so I did that on my phone on  the way here. But I noticed it came with stickers, so I wanted to check if that was if I preorder it or does it come with the stickers because my uni friend, like my friend I made at uni not that I go to uni now, we were at the same uni but not the same course but it was similar course, but not the exact same, but - 

C (Looking very confused): Sorry, sir, what was your question?

G( Approaches the counter stepping in front of M): Sorry, he wants to ask: "Are the stickers a preorder bonus?"

C Yeah they are.