A = Artist
AB = Art Buyer
Both Art Dealers speak in fake, ridiculous posh accents.
AD1 and AD2 come into a very long, very white room. There are wall to wall paintings that are just white. up each side of the room there are long tables with white frilly cloths. At the end of the room there is a semi-circle stage area. At the back of the stage there is a red velvet curtain covering up a painting. There is a microphone on the stage.
AD1
So they'll be food on the tables up here and here
(Pointing Stupidly at both sides, AD2 copies AD1'S actions.)
AD2
Ya, Ya and we'll walk up the middle.
BOTH
(Both AD start walking up towards the stage fake smiling and waving.)
pa pa pa fu fu fu huh huh huh
AD2
Then we'll introduce the art buyer and the artist.
AD1
Ya Ya we'll say something like Welcome people of the art world. thank you for coming please welcome Mr. Frances and The artist herself Ms. Helen Oswald.
AD2
Then we'll reveal the painting.
AD1
Do you think we could have a little peek?
AD2
I don't see why not... I mean we are paying for tonight.
AD1
Ya it's only fair.
(They pull back the red velvet curtain. to reveal a red painting. both AD'S gasp.)
AD2
(pointing)
It is not white!
AD1
the HORROR!
(Both AD's swoon and fall to the floor.)
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