1 EXT. STREET - DAY 1
A man (PAPER SELLER) in a long brown coat, is standing in front of a small newsstand. There’s a sign that says ‘FAKE NEWSPAPERS INC.’
PAPER SELLER
Fake news, get your fake news here.
Another MAN approaches the stand.
MAN
Why would anyone buy fake news?
PAPER SELLER
All the papers already print fake news, exaggerated stories, gossip and all that, why not jump to the end.
An OLD LADY approaches the stand, grabs a paper and pays.
OLD LADY
(To Man.)
I buy it because, well at least they’re honest.
The old lady leaves and exits the screen.
PAPER SELLER
See, honesty is hard to come by these days.
MAN
I guess you know your audience.
PAPER SELLER
Plus, people are more willing to spend money on knowing it’s rage bait that they can show to their friends. Rather than be baited themselves.
MAN
So what’s the difference between this and a regular paper?
(CONTINUED)
1 CONTINUED: 1
PAPER SELLER
For one thing, mines are 25p. The stories are better written but I guess pretty much the same material.
MAN
So you wait for the other papers to come out and copy them then?
The paper seller moves his hands around along with the words.
PAPER SELLER
No, my paper is printed the same day as the big papers. I just got really, really good at guessing. They always follow the same pattern you see. Big celeb does bad thing. Followed by an explanation of what really happened. A lot of the time the title has nothing to do with the story.
MAN
Do the celebs not get mad? Try to get you to stop?
PAPER SELLER
No one is coming for the man who sells joke papers for 25p.
He taps his nose to show he’s in the know.
MAN
That explains the price.
PAPER SELLER
You want one? Just you’re causing a queue.
The camera zooms out to reveal a long queue waiting and looking very annoyed.
MAN
Oh, go on then. For 25p that’s a good laugh.
The seller grabs a paper and hands it to the man.
PAPER SELLER
See, it works.
(CONTINUED)
1 CONTINUED: (2) 1
The man hands him 25p.
MAN
Ah, yeah I get it now.
SKETCH END
No comments:
Post a Comment