We Three Meet Again - Sketch

 EXT - CLEARING IN THE WOODS - NIGHT

Three witches stand around a huge cauldron. One witch is very old and haggard. This is BABA YAGA. Another wears a rather classic witch outfit she is BLACK ANNIS. Last is a young-looking witch in a red, fitted dress. She is LILITH.

BLACK ANNIS

No, it’s your turn, Baba. I did it last time.

BABA YAGA

Yeah, but I brought the last sacrifice. And you know how hard it is to get a newborn babe on a Tuesday night. People just aren’t born on a Tuesday nowadays.

BLACK ANNIS

That’s why I took over your duties last time. What’s stopping you tonight?

BABA YAGA

I don’t see why Lilith can’t make it.

BLACK ANNIS

You know fine well the poor girl’s lost all her fingers from those backfired curses. It’s been going tits up ever since she sat on her wand.

BABA YAGA

(To Lilith)

Why do you use a glorified twig anyway girl? You know a good old cackle will do it.

BLACK ANNIS

Leave her Baba. She’s young. The Crones hasn’t gotten her yet.

LILITH

She may have lost her fingers but she never lost her ears. And I’ve been around much longer than you Annis. But not quite as long as this old hag.

BABA YAGA

Watch it, little girl. I could snap you with nothing more than a wink. A youthful body only gets you so far.

LILITH

Oh really, and who was it Satan chose to be his wife again? Was it you? No? That’s right it was me, wasn’t it?

BLACK ANNIS

Just make the bloody tea Baba!

BABA YAGA

Stay out of it Annis! If Satan loves you so much then why are you stuck here with your broken twig then?

Lilith begins to float in the air.

LILITH

(Her voice goes deep)

Watch it bitch. I have hellspawn at the tip of my-

Lilith suddenly drops down the the ground, landing on her feet.

LILITH

(Cont. Regular voice again)

Oh, shit.

Baba Yaga begins cackling.

BABA YAGA

You stupid girl.

BLACK ANNIS

I guess I’ll make the tea.

Annis begins putting teabags into the bubbling cauldron.

BABA YAGA

Here let me help you. By adding the (beat) who’s job was it to bring sugar?

LILITH

Uhhm, well me.

BABA YAGA

Oh wow, how was Mrs No-Fingers expecting me to make the tea without all the ingredients?

LILITH

That’s Madam Satan to you. And how was I supposed to carry…

BLACK ANNIS

Oh dear, here they go again. Look gals, I’m just gonna shoot off. Got a familiar to feed and all that.

Black Annis grabs her broom and flies off. We can hear the muffled arguing of Baba Yaga and Lilith.

SKETCH END.