Supermarket Races - Sketch

 INT - AFTERNOON - SUPERMARKET

A lady is entering a supermarket. We hear the back and forth of two narrators - NARRATOR 1 and NARRATOR 2. The camera follows the lady as she goes through the supermarket.

NARRATOR 1

She’s nipped to her local cheap-o shop. It’s midday and she’s only here for milk. She’s taking a deep breath in and (beat) She’s off.

The lady starts walking through the supermarket bypassing the veg section and heading for the dairy section.

NARRATOR 2

Let’s get that clock on the screen.

A timer is displayed on the screen counting up.

NARRATOR 1

She’s made it past the first hurdle and avoided the fruit and veg aisle and is heading straight for the dairy section.

NARRATOR 2

That’s where most customers slip up, wasting a lot of time following the flow of the store.

NARRATOR 1

Exactly, she’s already saved a good five/ten minutes there. Looks like we’re dealing with a real pro!

The aisle leading to the dairy section has only one woman in it with a pull-along basket. As soon as the customer approaches she starts weaving in and out with the basket making it hard to pass her.

NARRATOR 2

Uh-oh, looks like… yep it’s a low-down pull-along basket. The favourite of these shops.

NARRATOR 1

The natural enemy of the busy shopper. (beat) she darts left, she darts right but this basket fiend is weaving like a madwoman!

NARRATOR 2

It looks like our customer is at a loss and… no!

The woman with the basket suddenly stops looking oblivious to her surroundings.

NARRATOR 1

The woman with the basket has suddenly stopped for absolutely no reason! 

NARRATOR 2

But this is a great opportunity to squeeze past unnoticed!

The customer squeezes past the woman and begins to pick up speed. As she reaches the corner of the aisle she notices a child's teddy is on the floor.

NARRATOR 1

And she’s past! Power walks up to the corner but a child's teddy has fallen out of the pram.

Slowmo of the lady cutting the corner and jumping over the teddy before the mother picks up the toy.

NARRATOR 2

WOW. Incredible apex jump there. Making up beautifully for lost time with the basket weaver. And what’s this? She has secured the milk!

The customer picks up milk from the fridge. And begins walking down the wine aisle that looks empty.

NARRATOR 1

Not only that but she’s found one in date and not already opened!

NARRATOR 2

Result!

NARRATOR 1

Now, it’s too busy going back the way she entered the aisle so there’s only one way for it, yep it looks like she is going through the wine aisle.

NARRATOR 2

Looks pretty empty from where we are. (beat) wait what’s this?

A huge family (group of eighteen) suddenly appear at the end of the aisle they look and move like zombies.

NARRATOR 1

Looks like a sudden hoard of slow walkers. Family of eighteen I’d say.

NARRATOR 2

Nothing for it but to shuffle behind.

NARRATOR 1

I don’t think our customer is going to settle for that. Look at her go!

The customer nips and squeezes past very agile through the gaps. 

NARRATOR 2

The footwork! She’s able to move nimbly through those tiny gaps.

The customer looks for a self-checkout.

NARRATOR 1

She’s through the zombies and has reached the tills. She panically looks around and… no self-checkout!

NARRATOR 2

She must be feeling defeated right about now but she’ll persist knowing there’s no milk for a cuppy. She joins till number one with no other option.

She joins the only till out of four open. The queue is massive some people have two trollies worth of food.

NARRATOR 1

Only one of four tills is open. And looks like three families worth of shopping in that queue too.

NARRATOR 2 

Wait what’s this till three is opening. The question is, does she stay or-

As the till opens the huge family from the wine aisle sprints to the till.

NARRATOR 1

Noooooo! The zombie hoard suddenly picked up speed and filled the queue before she could make a move.

NARRATOR 2

It really shows just how quickly the game can change.

NARRATOR 1

This queue isn’t gonna move any time soon. Especially with Chatty Cathy on the till today. We’ll watch and see what happens. Tune in later for the final time.

DISSOLVE TO:

INT - SUPERMARKET - LATER AFTERNOON

The lady is now at the front of the queue paying for her milk.

NARRATOR 1

Stop the clock!

NARRATOR 2

Success!

NARRATOR 1

Let’s see that twenty minutes all for a pint of milk.

NARRATOR 2

Not our best time but not the worst.

NARRATOR 1

Good game customer, good game.